The Stories We Tell Ourselves (and What Happens When We Outgrow Them)
Every founder, coach, and small-business owner carries quiet assumptions about who they are in business.
Not the public version.
Not the polished bio.
But the internal narratives that quietly influence how you show up, market your work, and communicate your value.
These stories sound like:
“I’m not good at sales.”
“I’m too introverted to put myself out there.”
“I don’t have enough experience to lead others.”
“I’m not business-minded enough to start my own business.”
Most of these statements aren’t chosen intentionally.
They’re inherited. Formed years ago. Repeated until they feel true.
But for many entrepreneurs, these stories no longer match who they’ve become.
Why the stories you tell yourself shape your brand and your business
Whether you realize it or not, your self-story directly influences:
how you talk about your work
the confidence behind your offers
the way you market
the clients you attract
the opportunities you pursue or avoid
When your story is outdated, your brand message can become outdated too.
This is something I see constantly when working with founders on brand clarity and content strategy:
The business has evolved, but the language hasn’t.
Your messaging still reflects an earlier version of you — a version that may no longer be relevant or accurate.
How outdated narratives form (and why they stick)
Most limiting business narratives begin in earlier chapters:
early jobs where you weren’t recognized
mentors who shaped how you thought about “leadership”
environments where visibility felt unsafe or uncomfortable
roles where you were told to “stay in your lane”
past versions of yourself who were still learning
Over time, those moments become identity statements:
“I’m not the kind of person who leads.”
“I’m not someone people trust to guide them.”
“I’m not naturally confident.”
These beliefs linger long after your skills, confidence, and experience have expanded. The mind holds onto what feels familiar, even when it’s no longer true.
How to recognize when your story hasn’t kept up with your growth
If you’re unsure whether an outdated narrative is shaping your business, look for these signs:
1. Your messaging feels flat or slightly “off.” You talk about your work accurately… but not fully. Something feels muted.
2. You hesitate to claim expertise you’ve actually earned. Not because you lack results but because your self-identity hasn’t caught up.
3. You feel more confident privately than you do publicly. Your internal growth hasn’t yet translated into your outward brand.
4. Your content sounds like an earlier version of your business. You’ve grown, but your message hasn’t grown with you.
These are all signals that a deeper shift is happening.
What it looks like to update your story — and your brand message
Updating your story isn’t about forcing confidence or repeating affirmations.
And it’s not about becoming someone different.
It’s about accurately defining the leader you are today.
Notice the outdated story
Understand where it came from
Decide if it still fits
Replace it with a grounded, honest truth
This creates immediate clarity in your marketing, your content, and your brand voice.
When your internal story changes, your external message becomes more confident, more aligned, and far more effective.
A question worth exploring
What story are you still telling yourself?
Where did it begin?
Does it reflect who you are now — or who you used to be?
And what would shift if your messaging reflected the version of you that has already grown past it?
This is the work I do every day with founders, coaches, and purpose-driven practitioners: helping them update the story beneath their brand so their messaging feels honest, confident, and current.
If your business has evolved but your messaging still sounds like an earlier version of you, I’d be happy to help you explore it.
Clarity comes from understanding the story beneath the strategy — and sometimes that story is ready to be rewritten.
